This used to be a place where i vent my frustrations over him. Now, this particular entry is just for momento sake. To record down what just happened today.

I'm always the one wanting to meet, no matter how long we've not seen each other. I'm a girl afterall. I've since changed from the "I will not initiate" to the initiative me. I've grown independent. Of course, not up to his standards yet.

Work's been tough. He doesnt know. He's not giving me any support in any way either. The stress of meeting appts and meeting targets. The stress of my managers questioning me on why I did not meet the expected target hunts me day-in day-out. Yet I still willingly set aside time daily to talk to him. Make an effort to meet him. But, the response i get in return is very much disappointing. I've repeatedly told him that I sleep at ard 11pm daily, so let's make it a point to talk before we sleep. It's definitely not much to ask right? but hell no. It IS too much for him.

Guys... When in courtship and relationship. What a BIGBIG difference. It's a month late. My 3rd yr gift from him. I'm trying hard not to bug him from him. Call it a test.. I really do want to know how much do I stand in his heart.

We had a massive quarrel today.. And I've never felt so hurt my entire life before. My pride's been smashed like a million times.

I called him at least 20 times. and that 20 times, he hung up on me. Not only so... He cut several calls while i was speaking.. An aries has massive pride. I wonder if he even cared. On my side.. I'm in office on a sunday.. I'm 10 appt short and I'm treated like shit. Not only so..
HA, he said i was like his ex. What an insult.

Babe, when are u going to stand up on ur own feet? Are u really going to wait for him to do something drastic before u realise what u're in?

the end

I guess this is the end.. Anyway u've always thought I'm the bad one.. I want to say, go look at the mirror. I dun say it to u doesn't mean I dun feel it dumbo! Which boyfriend in the right mind would let a girl go home late on her own? Which boyfriend would hang up the phone on his crying girfriend? Which boyfriend would lose his patience for giving assurances? Youyouyou! I can't stand your wake up late attidude. Can't stand your insensitivity to my emotions.. Can't stand that u can't make me laugh when I'm down. Can't sand that you're so lazy to work. Can't stand that dun call me back when we hang up while quarrelling. Can't stand that u dun Noe wad I need most when we quarrel.. Can't stand that u put ALL the blame on me. Then why am I so hurt? Damn u! Damn u for hurting me.

i will change

I will become wad u want me to be, then I'll leave u.

once upon a time..

Once upon a time the sweet things that we did were special to us, now u feel like it's a chore.. Once upon a time the patience we had for each other, now snaps as if it's a light stick.

selfish

You know that he's selfish when he stops telling u things that help u. Just becos I rebuke the first time u make a vow in your head to stop bothering me. And that's selfish, cos u know u shld telling me to study, but u dun selfish selfish! I hate hate!

u and your temper..

Hate you giving me attitude when u are in a bad mood. Hate u with ur ulcers. U meanie!

He is one heartless creature..

Heartless! Unbelievable... Today marks our 31 month tog. No doubt a friday too. He totally going to leave me and join his friends to GAME! I cantcan't stand his gaming habbits anymore! Not only so, I cant believe that he actually pretend to not to see me crY! wad a JERK!!!! Though I may have given my consent the day before, I am disappointed that he didntdidn't eVen make an effort to make things better! Come on, cant u at least make an effort to change the Venue , or maybe end earlier? Things kind of things also need me to teach you? No heart.. Thats all i see.. I tried to be nice and all yesterday, cutting u the slack that for the hundredth time u forgot the day again... But the reason y I'm so mad is because how freaking a jerk u are by ignoring my feelings and pretending to not see me cry! At least in the past U'd had passed me a tissue! U dun deserve me! PISSED.